global regions
IBM CEO Ginni Rometty:
Failing Fast
Author: Steven Zolman
In a previous blog post, I took great pains at articulating my 10 Reasons Why Ginni Rometty would fail as IBM’s new CEO.
In the post, I mentioned the poisonous sales culture (you live by the sword, you die by the sword), which is at the center (of blame) for this and last quarter’s missed performance targets.
Another concern was the ‘garage sale’ of business units that would inevitably have to come if IBM were to meet its targets.
As we have recently learned, IBM appears to be in the process of selling its server business to Lenovo, and it has long been rumored to be preparing its services business for sale as well.
It seems Ginni may be failing faster than even I had predicted.
Latest Update:
As most of you know, IBM missed its quarterly numbers again, much like Oracle, blaming the performance miss on a lack of hustle and execution from their sales organization and citing sales that slipped into the next quarter.
What’s interesting about that, is that it’s the second quarter in a row that IBM has used the same tired excuse.
This makes me wonder what happened to those sales that slipped from Q4 2012 to Q1 last quarter.
Why didn’t they show up in Q1 2013?
If anything, Q1 should have experienced some over-performance as a result of missed sales from Q4.
So, the explanation doesn’t seem to hold water unless there were significantly more slips in Q1 than there were in Q4.
Either way, it seems to be a wonky excuse.
What (in my humble opinion) may even be worse than the fact that IBM has missed expectations for 2 quarters in a row, is the fact that IBM CEO Ginni Rometty doesn’t even bother to show up to make the lame excuses anymore.
You heard me right. On the last earnings call to discuss IBM results with shareholders, Ginni was noticeably absent.
This must be an outrage to many key IBM stakeholders.
Ginni earns $6.1M in pay (not including her very lucrative stock option package).
It would seem as the top executive at IBM, she might feel compelled to explain the company’s poor performance for two consecutive quarters under her leadership.
IBM CFO Mark Loughridge did participate on the call, and was able to tow the company line, blaming the miss on poor execution, but then went into some death spiral about weak currencies as well.
Either way, things are not looking bright at IBM from an investor perspective, which is actually at the back of the curve for CEO tenure.
Typically,CEO strategies like the one Ginni Rometty outlined, while cannibalistic to the company’s core, start with aggressive company moves to dramatically improve stock performance, getting investors aligned, and only fail after the moves are proven to have cut muscle and bone, and not just fat.
IBM’s strategy of improving stock performance as the first step towards aligning investors to Ginni’s vision (which still has yet to be uniquely outlined), seems to have stalled before it has even gotten started.
Due to missed targets, and poor performance results, IBM will now “reposition” the business, which undoubtedly means IBM will more aggressively lay off its employees.
In the Rometty era, it appears misaligned, clueless executives and sales people with no technical prowess reside in the safest bastions, while super smart, US based customer support people, and technology heavy product innovators and developers are the ones most likely to be let go.
IBM is much like a desperate housewife, clinging to more glorious days gone by and trying to hold on to the past by getting plastic surgery to improve surface appearance, avoiding at all costs a seemingly declining future, and losing its soul in the process.
Ginni is now the plastic surgeon that keeps performing the procedures to strip the company of more of its soul, while trying in vain to improve its shallow appearance.
In the end, soul matters, and health is not just skin deep, and it seems that the signs now indicate that the market feels the same way.
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Ginni Rometty, from what I can gather from surfing the web, is focussed on Watson.
This is a brilliant strategic move which could
let IBM leapfrog Google, Facebook, and Amazon.
In my opinion, Watson can be a business bigger than Google.
The main question in my mind is whether Ginni can buy herself the time to execute. She came up through engineering and sales, so I wouldn’t count her out.
Time will tell.
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global regionsWorking Girl
Happy Birthday dear , Happy Birthday to you!
Did you make a
I got speech class.
What'dya need speech class for?
You talk fine.
All right.
pick you up at 5:00 and we'll ride back together.
I've got an Emerging Market Seminar at 5:30.
Geez, it's your birthday!
Can't they merge without you just this
What time is my surprise party?
Ah, I'm supposed to take you to drinks, have you home at 7:00.
I'll cut out early and be home at 7:15, okay?
All right.
Thank you very much.
Good morning...Good morning....Mr. Turkel's line.
calling, please?
Hold on a moment.
Um, hold on a second, all right?
Mr. Turkel?
Mr. Turkel?
Mr. Turkel
Um, Mr. Alagash...Hi....Uh, Mr. Alagash is on the phone and he's
real, real anxious to talk to you.
Mr. Turkel
You couldn't maybe get him to hold for a minute?!
Well, you got him in Dentitech, remember?
The one I told you to
go short on?
And it's fine, but he don't want to hear it from a
secretary.
Mr. Turkel
There's no paper!
Mr. Turkel
There's no goddamned paper in this stall!
Get me some?...Thanks.
You're very kind.
You're short on Dentitech at 18 and he'll be right here.
See Dentitech closing at 17 and an 1/8?
Come Monday I'll bet
it's 16 and still sittin' there.
How do you figure?
Well, they went public at 23 with one product, plaque removing
mouthwash.
You know, you rinse, you get this glob of plaque you
gotta spit out.
I mean, maybe it'll be big, but I say that no
one ever got rich overestimating what the American public wants
Mr. Turkel
Uh, before I run Tess, I have some good news and some bad news.
The straight shot, Tessy, is...they turned you down for the Entre
Program again.
We did all we could, Tessy.
I mean, you have to remember, you're up against Harvard and
Wharton graduates.
What do you got, some night school, some
secretarial time on your sheet?
Christians and lions, Tess.
That's right.
And the good news?
Uh, Dave has a friend.
Bob in Arbitrage.
You're so hungry, they're looking for hungry
down there!
Well, hungry is the name of the game down there!
Bob's looking
for a new assistant and wants to meet you for a drink.
This isn't another set up?
Do I look like a pimp?
Bob says he's looking for hungry, I think
to myself, "Tess."
The rest is up to you!
Bob in Arbitrage.
Bob Speck.
Extension 256.
He's expecting your call.
Go get 'em
Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday to you!
You should have told us!
Congratulations, Tessy!
Happy Birthday dear Tess, Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday!
Happy Birthday!
You look great!...Come here.
You know Mick, just once I could go for like a sweater or some
earrings, you know?
A present that I can actually wear outside
of this apartment.
So, is this where you usually meet for drinks?
Hmm, this is a big week!
It's a super week!
We are celebrating!
So, Arbitrage.
Talk about adrenaline, huh?
What do you think is
the most important quality for a great Arbitrager?
Well, we'll go through all that at the hotel.
The hotel?
Yeah, the company keeps a suite at the Ritz Carlton, and you
know, when it's empty, they give to us boys on a bonus basis--
We are gonna party!
Oh, sorry!
Allow me, I'm so sorry!
Oh, sorry, sorry!
I just get a little carried away.
what, Arbitrage has put out this sort of "Introduction To" tape
for the business schools.
Why don't we put it in and if you have
any questions...
That would be great.
It's the wrong tape!
Uh, unless of course you
want to....
Bob, you're not seriously looking for a new assistant, are you?
Well, not exactly at this moment, but I'm always on the lookout
for new blood.
I'm hungry Bob, but I am not that hungry!
Now, you see, I wouldn't put it that way.
Um, would you just pull over right here please!
What are you doing?
Party Bob!
You're late Tess!
Types message:
"David Lutz is a sleazoid pimp with a tiny little
Mr. Turkel
Take it easy!
You don't get ahead in this world by calling your boss a pimp.
Well, he is.
Been lookin' at your file here.
This is the third time in six
months I've had to place you.
Well, it wasn't my fault.
Where have I heard that before?
Ruth, look it.
I'm 30-years old.
It took me five years of night
school but I got my degree and I got it with honors.
could do a job.
I mean, you ask any of my bosses--even, even
Lutz--if Tess McGill hasn't called a few.
You ask them.
I don't think they're gonna sing your praises,
Here's somethin' for you.
Transferring down from Boston.
Mergers and Acquisitions.
Name is Parker.
Starts Monday.
go home and cool off.
This is the last time I can help you.
Four strikes,
you're out.
Tess McGill for Katherine Parker's office.
It's the last desk...at the end of the aisle.
I'm Katherine Parker.
You must be Tess.
Oh, great bunny!
Um, I don't usually have a bunny on my desk.
It was my birthday
a few days ago.
No kidding?
Mine's next Tuesday.
Well I'll be 30 next Tuesday.
We're practically twins.
Except that I'm older.
Just barely.
I've never worked for someone who is younger than me before.
for a woman.
Well, there's a first time for everything.
That's not going to
be a problem, is it Tess?
Why don't you pour us a couple coffees and come on inside.
I'm light, no sugar.
The stock is at 38, the tender is at 56....Come in....Yeah, what
do we do about that?
Well, I just checked my three.
Uh huh, yeah, I have that one.
Well, I think he's in an
underwater position.
All right, so that's our first and second
call and then we'll see where we are....Right.
I'll count the
Bye....Thanks.
So, Tess...a few ground rules.
I look at it, you are my link with the outside world.
impression of me starts with you.
You're tough when it's
warranted, accommodating when you can be, you're accurate, you're
punctual, and you never make a promise you can't keep.
on another line, I'm in a meeting.
I consider us a team Tess,
and as such we have a uniform:
simple, elegant, impeccable.
"Dress shabbily, they notice the dress.
Dress impeccably, they
notice the woman."
Coco Chanel.
Um, how do I look?
You look terrific.
You might want to rethink the jewelry....I
want your input Tess.
I welcome your ideas and I like to see
hard work rewarded.
It's a two-way street on my team.
making myself clear?
Yes Katherine.
And call me Katherine.
So, let's get to work, shall we?
This department's profile last
year was damn pitiful.
Our team has got its work cut out for
it....Okay, thanks.
I forgot my pills again!
It's the third time this
Jill, did you hear about that shot they got in Europe?
Yeah, they're giving it to women.
Yeah, to women!
They're givin' it to in their arm and it's good
for 5 years!
I tell you, these damn pills, I'm always forgettin'
I thought you might like this.
Why, thank you.
Tess, would you come in here, please?
And bring a notebook.
They already sold off both the paper and the printing divisions.
They sell distribution, too, we're talking real scorched
dirt....Come on in.
Tess, this is Ginny.
Ginny, Tess.
Being new in town, I thought I'd I throw a little cocktail thing
to introduce myself to the department, and Ginny here has some
great ideas.
Would you jot them down?
The caterer is called "Acme Eats."
You can get the number from
information.
They do the usual hors d'oeuvres and such.
"Raging Bull" has a bartender service.
And the liquor store on
Broadway and Liberty delivers.
Got that, Bess?
Tess. Yeah, um, if that's the way you want to go.
You have another idea?
Well, I was just reading a thing in "W" about dim sum, these
little Chinese dumplings.
There's a restaurant on Mott St. that
does them for cocktail parties.
Oh, I just love those little dumplings!
It might be more fun than the usual tidbits.
I have it on my
I could get it.
You read "W"?
I read a lot of things.
I mean, you never know where the big
ideas could come from.
Well, I guess you're right.
If dumplings can be considered a big
Well, that oughta get you started...
Ginny, thank you so much!
It's back to the gold mines!
Right....You'll set those up?
Right away.
Dim sum Tess, I like it...contribution-wise.
Keep it up!
Then the chief says, "We will respect your wish.
We will give
you an honorable death.
But first, keke."
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
So, come on Katherine.
What do you say?
Jim...the man who spends every weekend in August glued to his
desk--now that man knows that I can't just sneak out of my own
I'll tell you what, though.
You get me in on the
Southeast Air divestiture plan, I'll buy you a drink.
Crystal, two straws?
Okey-dokey!
Thank you.
What a slob.
You were so smooth with him.
I probably would have...
Never burn bridges.
Today's junior prick, tomorrow's senior
So, how do you think the party's going?
Pretty well, I think.
Should I stop serving now?
Hmm, better make one more round.
I'd love to help you, but...we can't busy the quarterback with
passing out the Gatorade.
Arnie, my hero!
You've come!
Um, I have an idea, and you said I could come to you.
Well, you know how Trask Industries has been looking to buy into
broadcasting?
Something about the department is...
Working on it.
I've been following it myself, and all of
a sudden I thought, "radio."
Trask is looking for television stations.
Well so is every Tom, Dick and Harry.
See, my idea is that they
get their feet wet in radio and build from there.
I mean, it's
not as glamorous as jumping right into TV, but it's a solid place
to start and there's a lot more of them for sale.
Plus it would
solve Trask's problem with his Japanese competitors, trying to
take him over, because FCC forbids foreign ownership of radio as
well as TV.
Interesting.
You've been...following this, you say?
No chance you overheard it, say, in the elevator?
Somewhere?
It's my idea.
Discuss it with anyone else?
You think that there's something there?
Well, I can think it through for you.
Why don't you leave me
your notes and I'll have a look-see.
Um, I've been trying to get into the Entre Program, and
this would be a big push.
I mean if anything...anything happens,
you'll remember....
Absolutely, Tess.
Two-way street, remember?
Thank you.
It's just, it's so exciting!
I mean, she takes me seriously.
And I think it's because, and I know you hate it when I say this,
but I think it's because she is a woman.
There's none of that
chasing around the desk crap.
And it's like, she wants to be my
mentor, which is exactly what I needed!
I mean, I feel like I'm
finally gettin' somewhere, Mick.
Tess, that's great, but let's step on it or the pizza's gonna
freeze, Honey.
I mean, maybe we could all go out sometime.
You know, dinner in
You would like her, I think.
God, remember when all you had to do was a few buckles?
Yep, those were the days.
I called the inn, and they said all
they can give you is a ground floor single in the new wing.
Did you tell them it was me?
Well, I said Parker.
Helmut? (Katherine speaks German to the owner of the inn)....It's
this tower room with a canopy bed and a fireplace big enough to
Everything's in place.
The man I've been seeing for a while.
I think he's it.
think this could be the weekend we decide.
He said that there
was something very important that he wanted to discuss with me.
I think he's going to pop the question.
I think so.
We're in the same city now.
I've indicated that I'm
receptive to an offer.
I've cleared the month of June.
am, after all, me.
Well, what if he doesn't pop the question?
I really don't think that's a variable.
Tess, you know, you
don't get anywhere in this world by waiting for what you want to
come to you.
You make it happen.
Watch me, Tess.
Learn from
Oh, by the way, you know, I ran your Trask radio idea by
some of our people, it seems that Trask is dead set on
television.
But hey, it wasn't out in left field, either.
really liked the idea.
You just keep plugging, bring me your
ideas, and we'll see what we can do.
Thank you Katherine.
Look at me.
Who makes it happen?
I make it happen.
That's right.
Only then do we get what we deserve.
(Katherine has a skiing accident)
Ms. Parker's office.
Hi Katherine.
Broke it skiing.
And they won't be able to move me for at least
a couple of weeks.
So this is what I need you to do....
Water plants, okay....Cable comes on Friday, right.
Hey, easy with the leg, will you?
Quit staring up my
gown!...Now, I'm staying at my parent's house and the housekeeper
is in Barbados for a month, wouldn't you know it.
What a mess.
You need to let in the flower man and the cleaning lady.
through the mail.
The entrance code for the front door is...it's
754-3-2000.
And um, I know there's more, but I can't think of
Go through the calendar on my desk.
There's a bunch of
invitations to be RSVP'd....I know I'm asking an awful lot Tess,
but I don't know what else to do.
I need you to take over.
Recording:
"Uh, regarding those horrid little knickknacks from
the Alberts, um, 'Dear Eleanor and Gary, thank you so much for
the beautiful salt and pepper shakers.
Not only are they the
perfect housewarming gift, but it was do dear of you to think of
me so far away....'"
"Dear Sister, it's hard to believe, but
it's been 8 years since we said good-bye to Wesley.
course, we never really say good-bye.
And on behalf of the
Alumni Giving Fund, I'm writing to you to ask...."
(Copying Katherine):
"Dear Sister, it's hard to believe it's
been 8 years since we said good-bye to Wesley.
But of course, we
never really say good-bye.
And on behalf of the Alumni Giving
Fund, I'm writing to you to ask...."
To ask...To ask...To
ask...I'm writing to you to ask....
(Recording):
"Dear Momo and Baa.
Here I am back in New York
living in Mummy's house while I brave the New York real estate
market, looking for a place of my own.
Of course, it makes me
miss you all so terribly, but it will be so lovely to see you
when you return from Barbados.
Till then, have fun.
to you and of course to Claudette.
Love, Kiki."
"...To Jack
Trainer, Dewey, Stone and Company, from me.
Industries Radio Network acquisition.
Um, hard copy on this from
the home computer.
Do not go through Tess."
(On Computer):
"Dear Jack, There's a light bulb over my
I know Trask and you know media.
And that adds up to us
finally doing a deal together.
Let's run with it.
Katherine."
"Two-way street.
And you make it happen."
What, no class?
This is not what it looks like.
I mean, it is what it
looks like, but I can explain.
Well, not exactly explain....
You snake!
Come on, Tess!
I'm sorry!
I really am!
I love you!
Come back and hit me!
Mr. Trainer's office, please...Hello, Tess McGill calling
from Petty, Marsh.
May I put her through?
Thank you....Mr.
Hi, this Tess McGill.
I work with Katherine Parker
over here in Mergers and Acquisitions.
I have a proposal that I
would like to discuss with you.
Not over the phone, though.
I have an opening tomorrow morning at 10:00.
messenger an outline over to you right now.
Bye....Yes, I'm
calling for Katherine Parker...In regard to your invitation.
Parker is out of town, but Ms. Tess McGill will be attending in
her place.
Yes, thank you.
Why does it do that?
For cleaning.
Are you kidding me?
What is this thing you're going to, anyway?
It's a closing party for the Minidyne-Dalton merger.
Dewey Stone
is throwing it, which is where this guy Trainer works.
perfect time to meet him.
Mix business with pleasure.
times are crucial.
What did you do, snatch her invite?
Well, she can't use it.
Besides, it's important for me to start
interacting with people, not as a secretary.
But as a total impostor!
This is it.
It needs some bows or something.
It's simple, elegant, yet makes a statement.
people, confident, a risk taker, not afraid to be noticed.
you hit 'em with your smarts!
Here, shoes, I need shoes...
It's not even leather!
Cyn, I can't breathe so good!
Come here.
Let's see if she's got anything
soothing....Valium.
In the convenient economy size.
It just chills you ever so slightly.
You won't even notice it.
Are you sure about this?
You want to be taken seriously, you need serious hair.
Go for the jugular!
Look, I've been telling you this for three
There are 19 million shares outstanding, we've got 25
We get another 5 percent, we've got 'em by the throat!
Listen, Trainer, let's grab 'em by the balls!
Leave our hearts at home!
Cut 'em off at the knees!
They'll be eating out of our hands!
What do you say?
Is anybody thirsty?
We need this one, Trainer!
You need this one!
I've been looking for you.
Do you know me?
But I promised myself that when I saw you, I would get
to know you.
You're the first woman I've seen at one of these
damn things that dresses like a woman, not like a woman thinks a
man would dress if he was a woman.
Thank you, I guess.
What are you doing here?
Actually, I'm looking for someone myself.
His name is Jack
He works at Dewey, Stone.
Do you know if he's here?
Why are you looking for him?
Well, because I have a meeting with him tomorrow and I thought it
might be nice to say hello and get a head start.
Well, he uh, just left.
Well, I should be going myself.
Well, have a drink with me.
I can't...What's your name?
No business cards.
No "You must know so and so."
What is this?
No resum閟.
Let's just meet like human beings...for once.
Well, it's nice to meet you, whatever your name is, but I really
do have to go.
One drink.
Okay, one drink.
But I'm buying.
Okay, but it's an open bar.
I knew that.
I meant that if it wasn't, I'd be buying.
Tequila gold....Doubles.
I promised myself that when we met, we'd drink tequila.
No Chardonay, no frog water--real drinks....These things are
usually so boring.
I wouldn't know.
Power to the people.
The little people....Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy.
Mmm, I'm fine.
I'm just fine.
I took a, um,
antihistamine
before, and it makes for a nice little buzz!
I didn't know that they let bad girls into these things.
Do I look like I don't belong here?
I'm sure that you're a real ace at whatever it is you do
Damn straight.
But how you look....
I have a head for business and a bod for sin.
Is there anything
wrong with that?
Mr. Turkel
And I have to go now!
Well, I'll come with you.
Mr. Turkel
Hey, don't go!
I need some air.
Meet me outside.
Thank you.
Excuse me, please....Hello?
Hello...Where do you live?
Hmmm, park, trees...tall building.
166 Morton.
Near Hudson.
166 Morton.
Might be kind of a mess.
The cleaning lady keeps changing days
Anybody's guess.
I'm just warning you 'cause...if it's
the day before, it could be pretty bad....I don't notice it so
much myself, but some of the people I've had over have...you
know...remarked on it....It's not so bad....Would you...Would you
like, uh, a nightcap?....I guess not.
Uh, I guess it's too late
for coffee.
No...I don't have any...but it always
sounds good when people offer it to me when I'm in your shape.
might have a little brandy myself....Boy, you sure are pretty.
Don't fuck up.
Don't fuck up.
Don't fuck up....Hi, Tess McGill
to see Jack Trainer.
May I take your coat?
Yes, please.
Gentlemen?
Tess McGill.
Miss McGill.
I'm Jack Trainer.
How are you?
This is, uh, John
Romano and Bernie Kotar.
Sit down, please....Coffee?
Milk or sugar?
Um, yes, both, thank you....Well, I suppose we should just get
right down to it.
Is that okay?
Sure, please.
I've lost my briefcase....In each of the last three quarters,
Trask Industries has announced plans to acquire a major market
television station, each time unsuccessfully.
At the same time,
they've expended time and money fighting off a hostile takeover
attempt by one of their Japanese competitors.
Buying into radio
would, in one fell swoop, accomplish two important tasks.
would give Trask a solid base in broadcasting, and because of FCC
regulations forbidding foreign ownership of radio stations, it
would wipe out the threat of a Japanese takeover.
Mr. Romano
Interesting idea.
But I don't like it.
Trask has a lot of cash
on their balance sheet.
That's one of the big reasons they're a
takeover target.
And a radio station is small potatoes.
see him biting.
Well, I've already thought of that.
I figured that we'd look for
a radio network, one with a real high profile.
And with the
surplus cash, we implement a major stock repurchase.
So Trask is
protected and their stock goes up, and everybody's happy...or
Oh, shoot me, just shoot me!
Would you cut that out?
They didn't throw you out, did they?
Well, they don't exactly have bouncers, you know.
little more subtle than that, Cyn...Oh God, and last night!
I should've checked the milligrams.
Live and learn.
Well, you know, maybe he'll feel sorry for you, and make it up to
you doing your deal or whatever it is.
I'm not looking for sympathy.
You know, I had a shot at it...you
He's here!
Uh, do me a favor, do me a favor.
Be my secretary!
Cyn, please!
Do it for me?
May I help you?
Jack Trainer to see Miss McGill.
Let's give her a shout, shall we?....You decent?....A Mr. Jack
Trainer to see you, Miss McGill.
Thank you, Cynthia.
Hold all calls, Miss McGill?
Yes, Cynthia.
Thank you.
Can I get you anything, Mr. Trainer?
Coffee, tea, me?
Isn't she a riot!
That'll be all, Cynthia....Why did you say you
weren't you last night?
Because I knew what would happen.
All Mergers and Acquisitions.
No lust and tequila.
That was...I mean, that just happened, okay?
I want to make it
clear, um....
What did happen, exactly?
The earth moved.
The angels wept....The polaroids are uh, uh,
are in my other coat....Nothing happened.
Nothing happened.
I woke up in my underwear.
I'll bet you looked nice.
Did you get me that way?
I, uh, I took off your shoes.
I took off your dress.
on the bed, and I kept my eyes closed the whole time.
And that was it?
I might have peeked.
I don't remember.
Look, I don't have all
day to hang out here and discuss your sex life.
What's this?
What's this for?
I thought you could use a better briefcase if we're gonna put
this deal together.
You liked it?
It has possibilities....I want to go first to Metro Radio
They're a solid, family-owned, mid-sized network in the
They had offers before and rejected them.
father's about to retire, and the son's just been forced out by
his board of directors.
A lot of squabbling--a good time to go
There's just one thing we don't get, though.
Why didn't you just
put it together with your people here?
Why'd you come to us?
Will you excuse me for one second?
You're not helping me!
Bess, my computer's down and I'm
right in the middle of something.
I need Katherine's office
right away!
Sure, of course, no problem.
I'll be with you in five minutes.
I need it five minutes ago!
I'll be right with you.
What's going on in there?
She's dusting.
Jack, listen.
My 1:00 is getting a little antsy, so, can I walk
you to the elevator?
Yeah, sure.
But first answer my question.
Um...I came to you because...I wanted an ace on this.
Good thinking.
Well, I'll fly down to Memphis in the
morning and feel them out.
Absolutely.
Look, everyone wants a part of the McGill mind.
I'm afraid
you'll just have to wait.
Ginny, go right in.
I'll be with you in just a minute.
I don't know how much longer I can handle this.
Uh, she's backed
What are you talking about?
Can I get you anything?
Coffee, tea?
Are you free for dinner tonight?
How about tomorrow?
I'll be back around 8:00.
When, then?
I don't think that we should get involved that way.
Well, what are you talking about?
What about last night?
Look, I'm not that girl.
Last night was...special.
It wasn't so special!
I had to carry you up three flights of
I meant unusual special.
Look, we're in a business deal together
now, and I just don't think that we should get involved that way.
My life is real complicated as it is.
I don't want to complicate it either.
I just thought dinner,
maybe a movie.
We both know what we're talking about.
I certainly hope so!
You know, maybe I just don't like you.
Are you sure she's gonna show?
It's my engagement party.
She knows she's dead meat if she
I'm real sorry I'm late.
I got stuck at work.
You're gonna be out of work, you keep scamming like you are!
Look, I'm nervous as hell, and I think Mick's about to drown
himself in a Scotch bottle.
He's bad, huh?
Throw him a bone, will you?
I want happy humans here tonight.
You look different.
Yeah, well, I'm not the same pathetic trusting fool that I was a
couple of days ago.
It shows, huh?
Hey, Tess!
How you doin'?
What are you havin'?
Stow this behind the bar for me, will you Tony?
And, um, I'll
have a Chivas, and buy Mick one of whatever.
You got it.
No, I just mean the hair, the duds, and the briefcase.
Make fun if you want.
You look good.
What, did you have to go to
traffic court or somethin'?
No, I just got off work.
I sort of got a promotion.
Well, to Cyn and Tim...to you and me...to you and your
promotion...to me getting a boat loan....
You what?!
My loan was approved just this morning.
Oh, that is...
Put a down payment on Jimmy Noonan's old boat.
...so great
"Hours of fun for the entire family.
Love, Tess and Mick."
Thank you.
I put from both of us.
I didn't know if you'd gotten somethin'
or what....Okay, toast!
We need a toast!....Thank you.
you....Okay, from me and Tess and everybody here...may your life
together be long and happy, and may the road always rise up to
Hey, when are we gonna toast the two of you, Mick?
Well, we haven't, uh, really discussed it.
I mean, not recently.
You don't discuss it, boy, you just ask.
That's right!
Yeah, here!
On your knees, Mick!
Tess, will you marry me?
That's an answer?
You want another answer, ask another girl.
You fucking humiliated us in there!
Well, you set us up, Mick, doing it like that!
What did you
expect me to do?
Lie if front of all those people?
automatically say yes?
Didn't know you'd have to lie!
I thought maybe you would want me
Three nights ago, I find you in bed with Doreen.
We barely have
a drink and a dance and then, boom!
You want an answer about the
rest of my life!
All right, okay.
Here we are, just the two of us.
marry me, or what?!
Jesus, Mick!
Do we have to decide this right now?
I want to get things solidified.
Things in my life!
You're not
the only one with plans, you know!
I said, maybe.
Maybe means dick!
Fuck maybe!
I want an answer now!
Please don't yell at me!
You treat me like I'm dumb.
Why are we always talkin' about the way you get treated, huh?
Who the fuck died and made you Grace Kelly?!
I am not steak!
You can't just order me!
Look, I don't need this!
You get your priorities straight, maybe
we'll talk.
Right now, we're history.
Katherine Parker's office.
Um, I'll switch you over.
It's me....I couldn't find the red shoes, but...
Tess McGill's office.
Who's calling?
One moment,
please....Jack.
It went well in Memphis.
Really well, I think.
gonna have to move fast and hit 'em high.
Armbrister thinks that
Metro is, uh...family, and you know how that can be.
willing to listen, but, uh...you gotta get Trask to talk sweet.
He's thinkin' about 70 mil....I've been up here all night,
workin' the numbers.
I'd like to go over it with you.
meet for lunch?
I mean, lunch is all right, isn't it?
a lot of people around.
Is that real romantic?
The souvlaki
stand out in front of your place.
You're in no particular
danger, I think....Yeah.
Meet you there around one.
Okay, I'll see you then.
Mick's really raw.
He says he's gonna throw the rest of your
stuff out.
He kept me there talkin' until 5:00 this morning.
Oh, God, Cyn...I'm sorry....How hard would it be to crash a
What are you talkin' about?
Oren Trask's daughter is getting married tomorrow and there's a
reception following at the Union Club.
So, I figured I'd blend
in...I get to Trask.
I mean, how hard could that be?
figure that the wedding party's not gonna admit that they've
never seen you before.
I mean, nobody knows everybody at those
things, right?
Tess, wait a minute.
And all I need is just 5 minutes with Trask.
Tess, I'm talking to you.
First of all, look me in the eye and tell me you're not thinkin',
even in your wildest dreams, Mister Briefcase-let's-have-lunch
there is gonna take you away from all of this.
We're doing a business deal together, that's all.
'Cause you know goin' in you're gonna get your heart stomped!
Just like you're stompin' Micks!
Hey, it wasn't me poppin' Doreen DiMucci in our bed, okay?
come you're all on his side?
But you're not even givin' him the slightest chance to
make it up to you, and that's not like you.
Look, all I'm saying
is, if you're so smart, why don't you act smart and save your ass
while you still can.
Else they're gonna find out, you're not
gonna have your job, or any job.
You're outta of your man and
your home already!
I'm gonna come clean as soon as I get my end set up.
know what I'm doing.
Yeah, so do I.
Screwin' up your life!
No, I'm trying to make it better!
I'm not gonna spend the rest
of my life working my ass off and getting nowhere just because I
followed rules that I had nothing to do with setting up,
okay?!....Tess McGill's office.
Hello, Tess.
It's your office?
Katherine!
Of course it's still your office.
I don't know.
I was just....
I'll see you, Tess.
Sometimes I sing and dance around the house in my underwear.
doesn't make me Madonna.
Never will.
Um...are you there?
Yes, Katherine.
Don't get too used to those long lunches, Tess.
They're letting
me go a week from today.
A week from today?
Isn't that a little faster than you thought?
Well, the doctor says I've got great bones.
Of course, his
aren't too bad either!....Anyway, I need you to summarize the
Baron Oil prospectus...
Hello, Miss Katherine.
Hi, Schatz!
...and uh, send that along to me along with the last
two quarterly reports.
You are a sport.
Yes, I'm a sport.
Thank you, Tess, so much.
I'll talk to you again soon.
So what kind of figures have you been throwing out?
Well, no exact figures yet.
Well, what's their ballpark?
Well, I wanted to get them excited about the concept before I
start throwing actual figures at them.
Well, are they excited?
They're going to be.
Well, wait a minute.
I've been working on this thing for 36
hours straight, trying to put this thing together.
progress meeting with my...the head of my department at 2:00.
Now where the hell exactly are we?!
Don't yell at me!
Answer me!
Well, I uh, as a matter of fact, am gonna see Trask himself
I feel that we're strong enough to go right to him.
All right.
Where are we meeting him?
What time?
He's not expecting both of us.
Are you trying to fly this thing without me?!
I wouldn't do that.
You go and set up this meeting without me. What does...what does
What the hell kind of way to do business is this?!
Would you calm down?
How am I supposed to calm down?
One lost deal is all it takes to
get canned there days.
Look, the line buttons on my phone all
have an inch of little pieces of tape piled on.
The names of new
guys over the names of old guys, good men who aren't at the other
end of their line anymore, all 'cause of one lost deal.
want to get buried under a little piece of tape.
No one's trying to bury you under a little piece of tape.
Okay, so I've been in a little bit of a slump.
I'm not afraid to
There it is.
Look, give me a break here.
leading me on.
If you've got some doubts about me, say 'em to my
Give me that much.
I don't have any doubts about you.
You need me...you know.
I mean, any doubts about your ability.
You need me at that meeting.
Is he jet-lagged from somewhere, or he just lunches late?
3:00 is a late lunch.
Well, it's not exactly lunch, but there will be food there,
What's the story, Tess?
It's his daughter's wedding.
That's the meeting?
Well, it's the perfect opportunity.
He's happy, he's had a
little champagne, we look for an opening.
What are we supposed to do, jump out of the wedding cake?
Don't be silly.
Come in, man.
Welcome to our party.
Nice to see you.
Do you know which table you're at?
Oh, I see Phyllis.
Glad you could make it.
Oren and Barbara Trask.
Tess McGill.
What a great idea.
Jack Trainer.
It's so nice to see you again.
Well, the kids thought it would, uh, be fun.
Oh, it's beautiful.
You must be friends of Mark's.
Well, let's get you over there.
Actually, I really should go powder my bathroom...nose.
darling, will you wait here?
Us, so nice...See you later.
I think I'll get a drink.
Oh, Bunny!
Get a grip, get a grip, Tess.
Get a grip.
We're not even invited to this thing, are we?
Okay, so we were not exactly invited.
But he's here, and we're
here, so that make us...
Total idiots!
...in the right place at the right time.
You're like one of those crazed cops, aren't you?
nobody wants to ride with!
Whose partners all end up dead or
Just act like you belong.
Do you love it, or do you hate it?
But Mark says it looks like Nicaragua and that we're
making some kind of statement.
It, it's just like paradise.
It's like a paradise with
little gold palm trees.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
I hope I'm not being rude, but...who are you?
I'm a friend of Mark's.
I'm just so happy that I
could...be here for you...today.
Stunning, really.
You're right.
This is crazy, so let's just go.
Excuse me.
The woman that's dancing with Oren, what's her name?
Bridesmaid
Oh...oh, Elizabeth Stubblefield.
That's right!
Bridesmaid
That's right.
You wanna do it...do it.
Excuse us.
Bitsy, don't break my heart and tell me you don't
remember me.
Of course I do!
Excuse us.
Talk about a small world, huh?....I mean, here we've just met and
yet I feel as though I've spent so much time working with you.
I'm in Mergers and Acquisitions at Petty, Marsh.
Oh..well, I really wish you were having more luck with your team.
Well, so do I.
I've been trying to set you up with a
radio network, but my bosses, they think that you're just stuck
on acquiring television and won't even listen.
Well, that's not true.
Well, that's what I said.
I said that the man who in 1971 looked
into the future and saw that it was named microwave technology,
the man who applied Japanese management principles while the
others were still kowtowing to the unions...
...the man who saw the Ma Bell break-up coming from miles
away...I mean, this man did not get to be this man, you, I mean,
by shutting himself off to new ideas.
Am I right, or am I right?
Well, I think you're right.
You're damn straight I'm right!
If you've got the right property, I'd love to hear about it.
You would?
Well, absolutely!
There she is.
Well, what...wha?
There she is, darling.
Umm..um, you know, I really, I just realized that I...I'm hogging
the father of the bride, and I see Phyllis coming in.
Well, what
do you say I give you a call on Monday?
Well, our media consultant is Tim Draper.
Tim, right.
Honey, I'm starved.
Go ahead and laugh.
He wants us to meet with his people first
thing Monday, so....
Oren Trask?
The man who said, "What if we sliced the bread
before we sold it?"
Yeah, all right.
No, no, no, I loved it!
I had fun.
And you were amazing.
You think so?
The, uh, the Fort Worth station...projected revenue should read
up 8 percent, not 6.
And where it says, uh...the FCC ruling on,
um...Metro's Memphis transmitter is pending, that's outdated.
FCC approved it Friday.
Doubles the signal reach...ups the
station's value by 30 percent....And now back to our regularly
scheduled programming.
I guess we're ready.
Trainer and McGill.
Top of the stairs.
Thank you.
Are we waiting for Mr. Trask?
Mr. Trask doesn't sit in at this level.
Of course he doesn't.
Here's the way we see it.
Industries has two important needs to meet at this point in time.
By acquiring Metro Radio Network, you nail two birds with one
stone, except the proposal...
Excuse me, do you, do you have any other proposals besides Metro?
Metro's a terrific opportunity.
Well, I'm sure it is, but a Chicago group just put a bear hug on
Metro this morning, and the company's in play.
Just this morning?
The Slade brothers.
Trask isn't aiming at radio anyway.
certainly don't want to get into a bidding war.
A moment, please...Armbrister looks at Metro as if it were part
of his family.
He cares who he's selling to.
And he holds the majority of the stock.
Look, if the
Slades are uninvited, and I'm sure they are...and Armbrister and
Trask can agree on a deal, then we won't have a war.
get Armbrister up here, will Trask take the meeting?
A lot of ifs.
We really don't want to get involved.
Twenty-four hours.
Not interested.
(Telephone rings)...Yes, sir?
right, sir...Yes, he'll take the meeting.
That was Mr. Trask?
Yes, it was.
How did he know?
He knows everything.
Thanks a lot.
Delivery Boy
How did you get this scar?
Some guy pulled a knife in Detroit.
I was nineteen and I thought it would be cool to have a
pierced ear.
My girlfriend stuck the needle through and I heard
this pop and fainted and hit my chin on the toilet.
Have you been telling that story ever since?
You're the only one who knows the true story.
Except the girlfriend.
I had her, uh...disappear.
It's too bad.
Nice girl.
There's something that I have to tell you.
*Telephone rings.
Hello...Hi...I know.
No, uh...can't wait.
Uh...uh, oh yeah,
Well, call me when you get in.
Uh...m-me too.
Okay, 'bye.
'Bye....Okay.
There's this woman.
It's over.
technically it's not.
I just haven't got a chance to break if
It's okay.
You don't have to explain.
No, really.
Look, we were supposed to go away...together a
couple of weeks ago and I was gonna tell her then.
But I had to
work straight through the weekend and I never got there.
just a...a timing thing....It's just, she broke her leg skiing
and was laid up and I couldn't see doing it over the phone.
know...kicking somebody when they're down.
I wouldn't have
mentioned it, except...she's in your department at Petty.
mentioned her the first time you called.
Uh...Katherine?
Parker, yeah....Now what did you wanna tell me?
Oh, it's not important.
One hundred twenty, even.
Twenty...thirty...forty...there.
You forgot your book.
Thank you very much.
Oh...Tess!
She took a muscle relaxant for the flight down.
Oh, let's all have one, shall we?
I don't think so.
Oh, telephone!
I need a telephone!
Oh, Tess, take care of the
I'll meet you at the car.
"Oh, Tannebaum!
Tannebaum!"
Oh, I love these pills.
Are there any more?
telephone):
Just for a minute, Jack.
I must see you,
My apartment in one hour, and I won't take no for an
No, I won't take no for an answer.
Oh, I'm home!
Oh!...Oh...God!
happen to see this?
What is it?
It's an outline of your idea for a Trask radio acquisition.
I was planning to send it over to Jack Trainer to have a look.
thought I'd give your idea one last go-around.
It just occurs to
me, looking at it, that it reads as though it were my idea.
see, Jack got burned once.
He was accused of stealing a plan for
taking a company private.
He's very sticky about the ethics of
reviewing other people's formative strategies.
He wouldn't have
looked at it if I'd said it was from a colleague and I couldn't
very well say it was a secretary's notion.
Anyway, the point is,
Tess, that I'm still trying to get you heard.
What am I saying?
If you had seen it, you simply would have
asked me about it.
Trust....I'll need help bathing and changing.
Katherine" Oh, I need something to cover this cast.
There's an
Afghan on the chair....Perfect.
If that'll be all....
Oh, and some perfume.
Uh, Shalimar...on the dresser...He loves
Jack Trainer, who.
He's on his way over.
I have to go.
Doctor's appointment.
Oh, one last thing?
Run down to the drugstore and get me my
I really have to go.
The doctor will understand.
Uh, keep the change.
Who is it?
It's Jack.
Katherine?
In the bedroom....Jack!
Katherine.
Boy, did I ever miss you!
Does it hurt?
Look at you.
You said it was urgent, Kath.
I'd forgotten how damn handsome you are.
Oh...thanks.
Look, uh...I meant what I said.
I really am
swamped and I...
Boy, some welcome home.
I haven't even gotten a kiss....Um,
there's some champagne in the little fridge.
You wanna get it
And then...then I really do have to go....Where are the
Try the dishwasher.
Here you are.
Mmm....You know I love you, Jack....You know that.
Katherine, I really do have to get going.
These past few weeks, I've heard this funny little sound way deep
down inside.
Tick, tock.
Tick, tock.
Tick, tock.
biological clock.
Big deal going.
Principals are all meeting at two...
And I've been thinking.
Let's merge.
You and I.
Think of it,
Mr. and Mrs. Fabulously Happy.
Katherine, it's really not a good time to talk.
You're right.
Can Big Jack come out to play?
Little Jack really has to get going.
Little Katie's been so lonely.
What is it?
Kath, there's something I have to tell you.
There's...There's
someone else and I...
There's someone else?
Some else that I have to be meeting with right now.
Can't be in two places at the same time.
Talk to you
Here we are.
Okay, I've got to run.
Sorry, 'bye.
Tess, you forgot your n...notebook....That...little....slut!
That...goddamn little bitch...secretary!
I'm meeting...Uh, I have a meeting with Mr. Trask.
Yes, your name, please?
Tess McGill.
All right, it's at the top of the stairs.
Thank you.
Receptionist
Miss...McGill?
Receptionist
Good afternoon.
Let me take your coat.
Thank you.
Receptionist
This way, please.
Thank you.
Is everything okay?
Yeah, yeah.
You're the only one from Petty here so far.
Flying solo on this.
Old Armbrister and Trask are over there in the corner.
We're all waiting to see what color smoke comes out of the
Tell me something.
If a colleague of mine had a strategy that
they needed help with, would you look at it if I asked you to?
Yeah, sure.
No ethics problem?
You know, open to accusations about stealing?
I look at stuff all the time.
Nobody's ever accused me of
What's it about?
Um...I don't know.
I'm so nervous, I can't stand still.
You'll be fine...I love you.
I love you, too.
Businessman
Gentlemen?
There was a story on the news last night showing life imitating
an old children's riddle.
It seems that a truck got stuck at the
entrance to the Holland Tunnel.
Too high for the clearance.
Well, for hours, the experts tried to find some way to unwedge
the vehicle, but to no avail.
Finally, a ten-year-old girl in a
passing car suggested simply letting the air out of the truck's
tires, thus lowering it to the clearance level, which they did.
And it worked.
Well, by letting some of the air out of our
strategy to expand into broadcasting, Miss McGill and Mr. Trainer
have effectively shown all of us here at Trask the light at the
end of our tunnel.
Armbrister
Oh, gentlemen, uhh, and ladies, I've decided to sell Mr. Trask
the Metro Radio System for sixty-eight point five million dollars
in cash and securities.
Now, of course, this is, uh, an
agreement in principle.
As to what constitutes principles in
this day and age, I'm gonna leave that up to you barracudas to
squabble over.
I'm certain they'll want to hear this!
Receptionist
Miss, this is a closed meeting and you can't...!
Thank God I'm here!
What the hell is going on?
You're being tricked!
That's what's going on.
Katherine!
What are you...?
Jack, just trust me and sit down! My name is Katherine Parker and
I'm an associate partner in Mergers and Acquisitions at Petty,
And this woman is my secretary!
She is not!
You're not her secretary!
I can explain, Jack.
Oh, Jesus.
You are her secretary.
While I was laid up with broken bones, she rifled through my
desk, found my memo outlining a Trask radio acquisition and has
been passing it off as her own idea.
It was my idea!
She stole it from me!
Good God, Tess.
Don't you know when to stop?
But you're lying!
Oh!...Thank you....Oh, thank you.
Thank you all so much.
up-side is that I have found out in time to control the damage.
We have containment and we have a deal on the table.
say...pass me a set of papers and let's get on with it.
Who's running this thing?
Just a second, please.
I know you don't believe me, but...Oh, it doesn't matter.
I'm sorry.
Well, gentlemen...the players may have changed, but the game
remains the same, and the name of the game is "Let's Make a
If you'll all turn to page twenty-two in your prospectus,
I'd like to take you through the terms of transferal.
Well, they did it.
Yeah..they sure did.
You really look great.
How are you?
Business is great and uh...
Mick, did you see me?
I caught it one-handed...Oh, hi.
Hey, Doreen.
And my boat's booked through three weeks from now.
working the lines for me.
That's great.
So how's life in the fast lane?
Well, um...fast.
It's real fasts and busy and....It's good to
see you, Mick.
I guess I better...get....
Yeah, it's good to see you, too.
Secretary #1
Cyn told us about what happened.
It really bites the big one,
Secretary #2
We took up a little collection.
Secretary #2
It's not much.
It's just enough to go out and get toasted some
night when you really need it.
Don't say no.
We really wanted
And no paying the Con Ed with it.
Okay, thanks.
Secretary #3
So what are you gonna do now, huh?
Oh, you know.
Start all over.
Find a job, a place to live.
just wise up and not take the whole thing so seriously.
Secretary #2
'Bye, sweetie.
Thank you.
Secretary #2
Secretary #4
So long, Tess.
Secretary #5
Good luck!
Secretary #6
'Bye, Tess.
Don't work too hard.
Secretary #7
Good-bye, Tess.
I've been trying to find you.
Just leave me alone.
Just one thing.
Was you and me just part of the...scheme, too?
Look, if I told you I was just some secretary, you never
would've taken the meeting.
I mean, think about it.
would've fed me a few drinks and then tried to get me into the
End of story.
That's not true.
Are you sure about that?
Can you honestly tell me that it
wouldn't have made a difference?
I mean, who's fooling who here?
What's this?
More stolen files?
No, it's my stuff from the desk.
Your stuff?
Now there's a broad term.
No, it's my stuff.
Look, you, maybe you can fool these guys with
this saint act that you've got down, but don't you ever speak to
me again like we don't know what really happened!
You got me?!
Tess, this is business.
Let's just bury the hatchet.
You know where you can bury your hatchet?!
Now get your bony ass
out of my sight!
(To Jack):
And if you really think that I said
I loved you as part of scheme, then that is really pathetic...you
My God, she'll stop at nothing.
What the hell kind of show are you people running here?
Oren, I'm sorry you've had to see this, but it means nothing to
Jack, let's get upstairs.
Not without her.
Trainer...are you trying to blow this deal?
I'm trying to make sure that it gets done right.
is this team's leader.
She put this deal together.
We shouldn't
proceed without her.
And you shouldn't go letting your Johnson make business decisions
I'm not, sir.
I'm telling you, she's your man.
And what brings you to that conclusion?
She said so, and I believe her.
I'm afraid that's not good enough.
Now are you with us or not?
Jack, I forgive you.
Now get on this elevator.
Sorry, Katherine.
You will be sorry, Jack.
Ask her to tell about the hole in your deal.
What hole?
Oren, she's just playing games again.
Let's get going.
What hole?
The People Page?
Now this is ridiculous.
Come on, you guys.
"Former Miss America Dawn Bixby has been house-hunting here.
Seems Dawn and hot, hot, hot D.J. hubby Slim Slicker are getting
ready to take a bite out of the Big Apple."
Businessman
Slim Slicker.
Slim Slicker's one of Metro's major assets.
Syndicated to all
their stations.
Number one in his slot.
The cornerstone of
their programming.
You lose him, and Metro's just some okay real estate with falling
And you're not exactly buying it for a write-off.
Better make sure he's locked in before they sign anything.
Oren, I have this covered.
Hear the lady out, sir.
There's another elevator.
You're on.
See, this is Forbes.
It's just your basic article about
how you were looking to expand into broadcasting, right?
now, the same day, I'll never forget this.
I'm reading page six
of the Post, and there's this item on Bobby Stein, the radio talk
show guy who does all those gross jokes about Ethiopia and the
Betty Ford Center.
Well, anyway, he's hosting this charity
auction that night...real blue bloods, and won't that be funny?
Now turn the page to Suzy, who does the society stuff, and
there's this picture of your daughter.
See, nice picture.
And she's helping to organize the charity
So I started to think, "Trask, radio...Trask, radio."
then I hooked up with Jack, and he came on board with Metro,
and...and so now here we are.
Oren, we really don't have any more time for fairy tales.
Well, Miss Parker...let me ask you a question.
How did you come
up with the idea for Trask to buy up Metro?
How did I, uh...?
Well, let's see, the, um...
The impulse.
What led you to put the two together?
Well, you know, I would have to check my files.
I can't recall
exactly the, um...
Oh, generally.
It's not as if it was in the mainstream.
You know, it would have to be the, um...Jack...help me out
here....Oren, I beg your pardon, but if you are insinuating...
Miss Parker, if I were you...I'd go to your office and take a
long last look around.
Because in about five minutes, I'm going
to see to it that you get the boot...but good!
Oren, this is a simple misunderstanding, and I...You cannot...
I can and I will!
Now get your...(To Tess):
What did you call
Tess & Jack
Bony ass out of my sight!
I'm sorry...but I simply won't stand for that kind of talk.
you excuse me, please?
Why didn't you tell us all this in the board room that day?
Well, no one was gonna listen, sir, not to me.
I mean, you can
bend the rules plenty, once you get upstairs, but not while
you're trying to get there.
And if you're someone like me, you
can't get there without bending the rules.
You've got a real fire in your belly.
Or was this just a
one-time stunt that you pulled?
I'm not sure what you mean.
I have something in my belly, but I
think it's nervous knots.
I mean, are you willing to go out on that limb every day, working
Legitimately?
Have to be right at the entry level.
Any problem with that?
Gumption, Miss McGill.
See you tomorrow.
Trainer, Dwayne...let's go back to my office and see about this
Slim what's-his-name's contract.
Be right with you, sir.
Secretary #2
Way to go, Tess!
Way to go!
Secretary #1
Thank you.
You like it?
Peanut butter and jelly sandwich.
Pen, pencil, ruler.
Apple for the teacher.
Now remember...play nice with the other kids...and make sure
you're home before dark.
I sold her three options.
I sold her two.
What are you gonna do?
Tess McGill.
Receptionist
Good morning.
Good morning.
Receptionist
The director is out sick today, so she'll want to see you first
thing tomorrow.
Receptionist
Um...Miss Baxter's already up there.
She'll show you the layout.
Receptionist
It's all the way at the end of the hall.
All right.
Thank you.
Receptionist
You're welcome.
(On telephone):
Anybody's gonna be an improvement over that
terrorist...I mean, just something semi-human.
(To Tess):
I didn't hear you come in.
I'm Alice Baxter.
Tess McGill.
I was just...using the phone.
Yes, well...that happens.
How 'bout some coffee?
Just tell me where.
No, I'll get it.
Um...oh...how?
Milk and sugar, please.
Thank you.
Uh...Miss McGill?
That's your desk.
I don't think so.
I sit out here.
I'm sorry.
I thought the secretary would sit out here.
That's right.
I'm the secretary.
If it's okay, I prefer
"assistant."
You've got a ten o'clock meeting with Slater from Development,
Eleven o'clock with Donahue from Logistics...his office is
on twenty-three, and lunch with Mr. Trask, his office downtown,
one o'clock.
It's all right there on the computer.
shift-S for your schedule.
Um...when I saw you...in here on the phone with your feet up, I
figured this was your office.
I'm sorry about that, Miss McGill.
It won't happen again, ever.
It's okay.
Maybe now would be good time to go over what you expect of me.
Um...I, uh...I expect you to call me Tess.
I don't expect you to
fetch me coffee unless you're getting some for yourself.
um...the rest we'll just make up as we go along.
I'll be...right outside if you need anything.
Cyn...guess where I am?
You got out!
Oh, my God!
I can't believe it!
She's out!
made it out!
She got out!
She has her own office!